When a lady walks by and she’s wearing like, I don’t know, thin white pants, or a skin-tight dress, or teeny short shorts, and you’re thinking like, man, she really needs some work down there, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Is it

A) She should probably hit the gym.

B) She should cut back on the doughnuts.

C) She should probably start buying a size larger, or

D) She should definitely get a BOOTY ENHANCEMENT spell cast by a powerful Wiccan Witch. Definitely.

We at BCU tend to either A, B, or C, or maybe a combination of them all. But hey, what do we know*, right? I mean for $8.95, it’s quite a steal! And free shipping?! SIGN ME UP. Just kidding. Don’t do that.

**Actually, we know that this is probably a ridiculous ploy by some woman who smells like cat litter and nag champa and lives in an attic somewhere.

Did you know that up until the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition hits the stands, none of the models know who is gonna be on the cover? I imagine them all (still in bathing suits, obviously) sleeping on the sidewalk next to the 4th and F newstand, waiting for the truck to drop off the magazines, after which a fight breaks out and for some unfortunate reason they end up naked. Is this how you picture it?

Needless to say, this years mag is out, and the lucky cover girl is the insatiably sexy Brooklyn Decker, a blonde bombshell who looks completely stunning in the cover photo. She will definitely have a place on our next tribute to hand bras.

Despite the fact that underwear companies have been pumping out bras since the 1800s, the classic “hot chick” photoshoot in many men’s magazines these days feature women using completely inconvenient items to shield their breasts, from the crossed arm move, to a strategically placed pillow. Our favorite at BCU, though, is definitely the hand bra. Seductive without revealing everything, the hand bra deserves an award. With the help of Maxim, we’ve compiled a few of our favorite hand bras from over the years.

1. Carmen Electra

We forgive Carmen for that terrible reality show she made with her then husband Dave Navarro, and we even forgive her for ever dating Dennis Rodman. Let’s be honest, we’d forgive her for just about anything if she lived her life wearing only a hand bra.

2. Jennifer Scholle

Who is this girl? Does anyone know? I think shes famous for being someone’s girlfriend? Or wife maybe? We really couldn’t care less because this is quite possibly the hottest picture in the history of the world: it’s a double whammy of hand bra and side boob, with the added bonus of a butt shot. Whoever photographed this- we salute you.

3. Bobbie Sue Luthor

The host of the über nerdy Junkyard Wars shows that there’s more to her than announcing whether the Catapult Carnage  beat Jet Grenade. Despite working alongside acne-ridden mechanical geeks, she’s retained a flawless body, exemplified by this high-quality hand bra photo.

4. Sofia Vergara

You might of noticed we’ve been talking a lot about the Colombian bombshell from ABC’s Modern Family. It might be because we love that show, or it might be because this woman has got a rack that acts like a homing device to all males in the world.

5. Joana Krupa

One of the artsier photos in the bunch, the dark background and rainfall do not detract from the epic example of hand bra sexiness that this Dancing with the Stars hottie’s got going on. Very impressive.

Remember when you used to watch Saved By the Bell and drool over how gorgeous Kelly Kapowski was in those denim jackets and leggings? Guess what? She’s still hot. The BCU staff presents you with a delicious array of your favorite TV sitcom starlets that are still smokin’ hot today!

1. Tiffani Amber Thiessen

All those days after school spent staring at Miss Theissen were not in vain. The star of Saved By the Bell is still a total bombshell today.

2. Keisha Knight-Pulliam

She was adorable as Rudy Huxtable on The Cosby Show, but now you have got to give the girl credit. This sorority girl has a killer body, not to mention a Celebrity Fear Factor win and degree in Sociology.

3. Melissa Joan Hart

As Sabrina the Teenage Witch, Melissa Joan Hart was cute, albeit awkward. Lucky, the awkward teen witch grew up and got totally sexy. It was like magic!

4. Soleil Moon Frye

With her weird, hippie-generated name and starring role as Punky Brewter, Soleil could have easily gone the route of hairy pits and lumberjack shirts. Luckily she didn’t. Although she got a breast reduction (which is kind of like slapping God in the face), we forgive her because she is still super hot.

5. Tatyana Ali

She was Ashley Banks, Will’s little cousin, who grew up right in front of our eyes. When the show ended, she released an album that went gold. All the while, she was drop dead gorgeous. We qualify this as a life well lived.

Photos courtesy of  Digg

This winter, San Diego has been disturbingly warm. As in, going to the beach, short sleeves at night, global warming is real-type weather. That is, until about two days ago. Apparently Mother Nature has gone completely nuts, because it will not stop raining. However, the BCU staff always looks on the bright side. Here are some ways to have an awesome Rainy Day Booty Call.

1. Get Limber

A few posts ago we wrote about the benefits of Bikram’s Yoga (bigger erections, anyone?), and right now is the perfect time to start. Take your booty call to a heated yoga class, where the two of you can get sweaty, warm, and limber. Then take the sexual tension back to your place and let your bodies do the talking!

2. Get Cookin’

Stir up some sexy food using libido enhancing foods like: avocado, figs, and oysters. Pour some wine and perhaps light some candles. The sound of the rain coupled with your erotic dinner will set the stage for some awesome winter booty.

3. Hit up the Spa

Over here in the Southwest, it’s been far too hot to enjoy a dip in the jacuzzi, until now. Grab your date and slip into a nice heated Jacuzzi (or just a bath) and see where it takes you. Remember: swimsuits are optional!

4. Play in the Rain

Maybe it sounds like the cheesy climactic point of every romantic comedy, but there is a reason the two characters always end up making out in the rain. It is totally sexy! Grab your partner in crime and get it on in the rain… and once it gets too cold, head inside for tip #5!

5. Play some Strip Poker

Light a fire in the fireplace and set up a game of strip poker nearby. Two-players will go by much faster than playing with a group, which is all the better! Whoever wins gets to call the shots afterwards, if you know what we mean (wink wink).